Friday, September 26, 2008

"In Russia, zero gravity weightlessness adapt to YOU!"

Unbelievable pictures of the Russian Space program. Are we ready to admit that they've pretty much spanked us in the Space Race?


http://www.boston.com/bigpicture/2008/09/the_baikonur_cosmodrome.html#photo6


When you see these photos, it's not hard to understand how those wretched, commie-era bread lines were a harsh reality for tens of millions of Soviets - all the badly-needed money and resources were pissed away to the glorious cosmos!

What a bunch of a-holes.

FS

Monday, September 08, 2008

Ponies: friend or foal?

Over the weekend, I was on the receiving end of some shocking information: a pony is not a baby horse. Up until this past weekend, I would have laughed at you and perhaps even accused you of witchcraft for having suggested such a thing. My friend, Jane, however, explained that, indeed, ponies never grow to be horses. I honestly had no idea.

Jane would never admit it, but she is quite the amateur zoologist, if only for a select group of species from the real and mythical animal kingdoms: ponies, unicorns, cats, kittens, puppies, and then the sub-species of cats wearing sunglasses and cats wearing funny hats. Clearly, she knew of what she spoke. Jane broke the news to me in the same way a person might sympathetically and cautiously inform an adult of limited intellectual capacity that it isn’t appropriate to pet the hair of a stranger, even if said hair looks especially soft and pettable. Obviously, at 29 years of age, being decades out of elementary school, and having visited numerous petting zoos as a child, I should have known this fact about ponies. What's more, one of my favourite songs is Johnny Cash’s “Tennessee Stud”, where one verse reads:

“Raced my horse with the Spaniard's foal;
Til I got me a skin full of silver and gold”

So “foal”, or baby horse, has been in my receptive vocabulary for some time. Yet the reality remains. I understand that it’s an important part of the human condition to be in a constant state of acquiring knowledge, but I’d rather not have the act of learning things be accompanied with the sense that perhaps I’ve been dealt a few cards short of a full deck. Tune in next week, when I discover that seahorses are not, in fact, equines with above-average swimming ability, and that dragon flies cannot, when caught and used skillfully, be used as inexpensive cigarette lighters.

FS